Everything I need to know I learned from The Last Unicorn...

- I want to be a true magician, make real magic.

- Now that I'm a woman, everything is strange, everything has changed.

- I once knew myself, my purpose, but now I have forgotten who I am, and I am lonely, and afraid.

- Even though I am one, and small, I can drive the red bull into the sea.

Sorry this is not meaningful for anyone who isn't inside my head. I was listening to my Last Unicorn soundtrack on the way to work, and I still can't figure out exactly why it is the most important movie I have ever seen, and book I have ever read. I know for certain that something in the story calls to me, far beyond the characters and the fantasy setting, it speaks to me about who I really am. On the Internet this book was big for a while: Are you a unicorn? I wish I had the site, I would love to show it. Well, this site was built around the hypothesis that unicorns still exist in the world as humans. Some of us are unicorns. If we recognize ourselves in some of the qualifications then we are unicorns. This stuck with me not only because I met all the criteria (that's right, I am a unicorn) but because it was such an interesting idea. I hate to steal someone else's idea... I've already read stories about people who realize they're unicorns, but what does that really mean?

The Lady Amalthea (who has profoundly influenced almost every heroine I've created) isn't who she appears to be. No one sees her for who she really is except the king. It's terrifying but also wonderful. She doesn't remember who she is anymore. This evokes emotion in me because it reminds me of who I am, who I once was, and the discrepancy. Sometimes I hear music (Like Last Unicorn or Neverending Story) and I remember the wonder I once felt, the innocence I once possessed, then I compare the fantastic imagination I once had with the person I am now and I shudder. I can't really remember who I am anymore.

That idea calls to me and calls to me. It plays over and over in my head like a song. I have written a whole novel about a woman who couldn't remember who she once was in a past life, and have almost finished a novel about a woman who has had amnesia blocking her memories as a child. It's a theme that really touches me.

I started thinking of the books I think are truly the best ever written which would be -- A Wrinkle in Time, A Swiftly Tilting Planet, The Last Unicorn, The Neverending Story, then there are my favorite fantasy movies Legend and Labyrinth and all of these have in common the quest. The protagonists discover courage. There is something in them that touches me over and over. Fantasia, the Goblin King, the Labyrinth, the quest, the Bog of Eternal Stench, the Swamp of Sadness, the rock-biter and that luck-dragon and damn but that luck-dragon has always made me feel so emotional and if only I could really pinpoint why.

That is exactly what I want to write about. People can say what they like about fantasy and romance but it gets you through life, and that isn't because fantasy is an escape it's because within the story you learn a truth. You learn about courage and coming-of-age. These stories have stayed with me and tapped qualities within me that have made me a better person. These stories make the world a better place.

This is what I want to write. I am done with darkness and am searching for light. I have almost forgotten my dark vampire Oona and the dark post-apocalyptic underworld.